Essay Option 5: The Battle Hymn of Exchange

“Hi, Jiao, how are you getting on with your preparation for SAT? What score do you expect to obtain?” “Hi, Jiao, what’re your grades in the finals? Will your GPA be high enough? Are you still doing your volunteer work? I think you should stop and concentrate on your studies.” “Hi, Jiao, what’s your plan for the college application? As for me, I will only go for the best; otherwise, there will be no future for me.”

Over the months, I have been pestered by a succession of emails and mobile phone short messages of this sort from Ling, my former classmate in China who is now also studying as an exchange student at a senior high school in a neighboring state. She is the kind of person who, had she a Tiger Mother, would willingly succumb to Amy Chua’s way of parenting because she is so motivated to become an elite.

But is getting high grades and entering a top university the essential purpose of being an exchange student? Absolutely not! We have had enough of that back in China and we want something new and different in coming all the way to the United States as an exchange student. Exchange is first and foremost about change—we want no more Tiger moms; nor should we simply go for top grades and top colleges. We need to assimilate positive American values, be an integral part of our host families and contributing members of the local community.

In recent years, more and more Chinese students come to study in the U.S. and proceed onto college education. Students like Ling simply take advantage of the free accommodations and food provided by the host families without sharing any household chores or mixing with the host family members, not to mention taking part in community services. They are mere beneficiaries rather than benefactors. They take the love and sacrifices of the host families for granted and simply use the American education and experiences as a springboard for a well-paid career. Self-centered and egoistic, they forget the ultimate mission of being an exchange student—to contribute to the welfare of the local community and to the society at large in exchange for the benefits they have received from the community and that society. Exchange is a two-way process and being a mere receiver who refuses to give will betray and subvert this noble mission of exchange.

Unlike Ling, I got involved in volunteer services from the very outset of my exchange program. Mr. and Mr. Johnson, my American “parents”, are devout Christians and, accompanying them to church for Sunday services, I looked after the kids of other church-goers and I became those kids’ Chinese “sister”. Mrs. Johnson has long bee a volunteer at a local nursing center and under her Samaritan influence I’ve become a volunteer there too, offering weekly musical performance to a dozen senior citizens who are handicapped, isolated and lonely. Rain or shine, I carry the heavy wooden string instrument guzheng to the center, playing for a couple of hours, chatting with the elderly, and keeping them company. Annett Smith, a former college sociology professor, and Frank Tabb, an ex-FBI agent, both suffer from amnesia and my flowing soothing music helped them recollect fragments of their golden old days.

I am proud of being an exchange student in the true sense of the term. My American “parents” have instilled in me the values of self-sacrifice and love—to make a difference in the life of the people we care about. I am forever grateful to them for bringing about this change in me. On my part, I have learned to care and to love in exchange for the care and love I have received. With my weekly musical performance, chatting, and company-keeping, I have since made a difference in the lives of this small, little-knwn group of the elderly, who now look forward to my visit as the most important event of the week. The fragments of memory which I helped Annett and Frank recollect, however fleeing, will be their eternal comfort.

I might not get into as good a university as Ling might do but what’s the meaning of getting into a top university without being able to make a difference in the lives of others? The smiles I have seen appearing on the faces of the senior citizens and the warm applauses that they give are infinitely more important the course grades or SAT score which I might have otherwise improved by devoting more time to my studies. I have already realized the value of my existence in a local community in Traverse, Michigan. The expectancy in the eyes of the elderly and the firmness with which they hold my hands as I wind up my morning visit and bid them farewell have spoken for themselves—I am needed and it is truly a great honor for a Chinese girl to be needed in this way.

　　　　　　　　　　交 换 战 歌

　　“Hi，蛟，你的SAT考试准备得怎样了？你预料会考到多少分”“Hi，蛟，你的期末考试考了多少分？你的GPA会够高吗？你还在做义工吗？我觉得你不该再做义工了，而应该专致于你的学习。”“Hi，蛟，你对申请大学有何计划？至于我么，我会全力搏些顶尖的大学；否则，我是不会有前途的。”

　　在过去的几个月中，我被琳所发来的一连串这样的电邮和手机短信所纠缠不休。琳是我在中国的同学，现在在相邻的一个州，也作为交换生在一所美国高中读书。琳这个人，倘若她也有个虎妈，就会心甘情愿地屈从于Amy Chua式的养儿育女方式，因为她具有如此强烈的动机，要成为一个精英。

　　但是，得高分并入读顶尖大学，难道这是做交换生的根本目的吗？绝对不是！在中国的时候，这一切早就让我们受够了。我们大老远地从中国一路来到美国，以交换生的身份进行学习，为的就是要获得一些全新的和迥然不同的东西。首先而言，本质而言，交换（exchange）关乎变化（change）——我们绝不再需要任何的虎妈，我们也决不应该直奔高分和各校而去。我们应该去汲取正面的美国价值观，成为我们寄宿家庭中密不可分的一份子，成为对当地社区有所贡献的成员。

　　近年来，越来越多的中国学生前来美国学习，并接着在美国上大学，获得高等教育。像琳一类的中国学生，只是利用寄宿家庭所提供的免费食宿，占尽便宜，却并不分担家务，或与寄宿家庭的成员打成一片，更不用提参加社区服务了。他们只求索取（只做受益者），不图回馈（不做施惠着）。他们将寄宿家庭的爱心以及所付出的牺牲视为理所当然，不以为然，只想将美国的教育与经历当作跳板，以谋得一份高薪的职业。他们自私且自我中心，全然忘却了做交换生的根本使命——要为所在的社区及所在的整个社会的福祉作出贡献，以回馈他们从这个社区和这个社会所获得的裨益。交换是一个双向的过程，做一个纯粹的获益者而拒不对他人有所付出，这完全背叛和颠覆了交换的这一崇高使命。

　　与琳不同的是，我从交换项目的一开始起，就投入到志愿者服务中。Johnson夫妇，即我的美国洋爹洋妈，是虔诚的基督徒，我陪他们周日去教堂做礼拜的时候，就担当起看护其他来教堂做礼拜的人的孩子的责任，我也很快成为这些小孩的“中国姐姐”。Johnson太太长期以来一直是当地一家老年护理中心的义工，而在她这种撒马利坦式的利他主义情怀的影响下，我也成为了那里的义工，为那里十多个行动不便、孤苦伶仃的孤寡老人每周进行一次音乐演奏。无论刮风下雨，我都会背着沉重的木质弦乐器古筝去往护理中心，弹奏一二个小时，与老人们闲聊，陪伴着他们度过一上午美妙的时光。Annett Smith 曾是一位大学社会学教授，而Frank Taab则是一位前联邦探员，现在他们两人均患有失忆症，而我那如缕不绝、慰藉心灵的乐曲，帮他们唤起了对昔日辉煌时光的记忆残片。

　　能成为一个真正意义上的交换生，令我甚感骄傲。我的美国洋爹洋妈在我内心注入了自我牺牲和爱的价值观, 这就是要在我们所关爱的人的生命中带来改变。我衷心感激我的洋爹洋妈在我内心带了这种价值观变化。而在我这方面，我也学会了去关爱他人，以回报我所获得的关爱。我用我每周一次的音乐演奏，闲聊及陪伴，在这一小群几乎不为外人所知的老人的生命中带来了改变。现在，他们将我的到访视作一周中最重要的事情。而我帮助Annett 和Framk 所唤起的记忆残片，无论是多么的昙花一现，终将成为他们永恒的慰藉。

　　我知道，我入读的大学可能不会像琳入读的大学那样顶尖。但无法在他人的生命中带来改变，进一所顶尖大学又有何意义？我所看到的出现在老人们脸庞上的笑容，以及他们所给予的热烈鼓掌，要远比课堂分数或SAT考分重要得多，虽然我如果将更多的时间花在学习上的话，这些分数我是完全可以弄得更高的。在Michigan州Traverse市的某个当地社区里，我早就意识到了我生存的价值。每当我结束上午的造访与老人们道别时，他们对我下次到访的期待眼神，以及他们依依不舍紧握着我的手，这些已经说明了一切——他们需要我。而对于我这个中国女孩来说，能够以这种方式被人需要，实乃荣耀至极。